Getting Decisions

Two strategies to help others make a choice

 

Now some are saying, “Another sales article! Let’s get something that applies to the rest of us!”

 

The fact of the matter is that these two ideas or strategies do apply to anyone we are trying to get some type of decision or choice from.

 

It really doesn’t matter if we are in a selling situation, coaching an employee or getting a family member to make a choice. The ultimate outcome is getting a choice made.

 

Just this afternoon I had a discussion where a family was pushing John to make a choice. They were applying pressure in various ways to get John to make a choice the family felt he should. The results were showing up as even more resistance from John, and him wanting to go the other way!

 

Pushing just never seems to work, unless you want to build more resistance to your ideas.

 

So what can we do?

 

Ok, here are two ideas that will work in bringing down resistance to your ideas…..

 

Before we start, we need to understand a few basics about why people resist making choices. There are several, but here are a few:

 

1. Fear can be a big one! This could be many types of fear such as fear of a mistake, being taken advantage of, change, being pressured, not trusting and you can continue to add to the list.

 

The reality is that anytime we make a choice or decision our brain is weighting out the pros and con’s about the idea. It’s all part of our built in survival behaviors from ancient times and the fight/flight reaction.

 

The resistance is there no matter what, so how do we deal with it, overcome it or move it out of the way?

 

2. Beliefs are also a very big factor in our choices. Most people are not always aware of how their beliefs affect them, but they do! Dr. Kevin Hogan uses the statistic that 20% of the population is very self-aware while 80% is not.

 

That’s why if you ask a customer or others why they made a given decision, it generally is a surface answer like “Got a good deal” or “It felt right”. It’s because they have not really examined their beliefs that directed the choice!

 

If you are going to persuade someone else, you need to understand some of their beliefs and help them to see how your proposal will line up with those beliefs. 

 

Now there is a lot more to this, but if you can be aware of just these two it will make a difference in your persuasion efforts.

 

Just remember…

 

BIG KEY: By acknowledging the resistance up front, almost always the resistance disappeared or was greatly reduced! Omega Strategies, Dr. Eric Knowles.

 

So what can we do to overcome fear and beliefs while acknowledging resistance up front?

 

By going either to the future or the past and having choices and decisions made there!

 

Whaaaaaat?

 

Yep, if you examine your own thinking while trying to make a choice right now, you find the pros and con’s at work in your head going yes, no, yes, no etc. The resistance is there!

 

Now think about a choice you made in the past. Is it easier to look at that choice and perhaps make the same choice again? Sure it is, because you know the outcome already, there is no fear and you know if it fit your beliefs.

 

The same is true of projecting to the future and seeing the decision being used. There it is, all the results are occurring and in line with the beliefs. The pros have won!

 

Now many sales people will say they use the future picture many times and it’s in sales training programs, so what is so different?

 

Good question, here is some insight!

 

1. The Future Picture is highly effective because it is safe for the other person to go there. It’s not real, only a projection. (The subconscious does not know that) In this way they can view it from a form of “past view”, it’s presumed to all ready to have occurred.

 

The fear is gone and they are open to talking about it.

 

Here is the key that is different!

 

Have them now indicate all the resistance that was overcome in making this future projection come to be, and what was it that overcame each resistance! Be sure you’re writing these down as they provide them. You may have to probe or pry 2-3 times to get the real answer, just be genteelly persistent.

 

More on how to use this information shortly.

 

2. The Past Choice Picture is great because it is very safe and familiar! They have already made the choice and feel good about it.

 

Ask them to take you back to a good decision they have made and describe the situation and decision to you.

 

Ask them to think about the resistance they had to overcome in making that good choice and what was it that made them move forward. Be sure you’re writing these down as they provide them. You may have to probe or pry 2-3 times to get the real answer, just be genteelly persistent.

 

Guess what! You now have the information on how they make their decisions!!! (We call these key decision factors.) How many times do you wish you would have had this?

 

By doing one or both of these methods up front you can now fashion your questioning and proposal around these decision factors! Meanwhile the past/future pictures are working in their conscious and subconscious mind.

 

You can introduce these concepts up front by using similar language like this:

            Before we start, I realize there may be concerns, let’s just imagine …..

            I am sensing some concerns here, let’s suppose you did……

            I realize making choices can be tough, let’s talk about a choice you have made….

 

Then, when you are asking for the decision, take the key decision factors out and ask them if you have addressed each of these issues for this decision. They will most likely acknowledge you have and go ahead with the decision!

 

If not, you simply ask which of the factors has not been met that causes the mistrust.

 

And yes, these strategies do work with employees, groups and family!

 

Try it! You’ll like it! Especially the enthusiastic results you’ll get!

 

Want more on these and other persuasion and resistance strategies? Contact us at www.BusArcOnLine.com  www.BusArc.com www.HGoergerassoc.com

 

To your continued success!

 

Harlan Goerger

 

©Harlan Goerger 3/2007